The Joneses are at it again. They have upgraded their inground swimming pool. It’s like they are determined never to let you catch up with them. And it’s like they are not even trying. We understand. And we can help.
There is a simple, yet well-kept secret to turning the tables on the Joneses. Stop trying to keep up. Play their game. Get ahead of them and stay there. Let them feel the envy you have endured since they first flaunted their inground swimming pool in your face.
You installed your swimming pool. Your entire family enjoys it. You’re their hero. But you can’t escape the feeling that Mr. J is going to do something to his pool to one-up you. Act now! Catch him sleeping while you add these features that will turn him green with envy.
Wait for the look on the Jones’ faces when they see your backyard turn into a Pennsylvania pool paradise with sculpted contours, rock formations (real or faux), and expertly chosen flora.
Hide a Slide
Remember how you felt like Clark Griswold when the Joneses added a slide to their pool? Include one that is part of the landscaping. John and Joan, little John, and Jody won’t even know what you’ve done until after you invite them over for a slice of lemonade and humble pie.
Include a waterfall with a hidden grotto in that landscaping. They come prefabricated and provide a “special place” for you and the missus to spend some quiet time unseen and undisturbed behind the curtain of the waterfall. Don’t even tell them about your secret cave. When they add a waterfall to their pool, your grotto will still have you one up on them. See how this game works?
Bring the Heat
Extend your pool season by adding a heater. Swim earlier in the spring and later into the fall while Mr. J is trying to convince Mrs. J that they can enjoy their pool when their water temp is 65 degrees.
The Finishing Touch
The Joneses don’t need to know everything you are doing. It’s what they think they know. Let’s hide the heater out of sight. Tell them you arranged an exclusive deal with the folks over at the Limerick nuclear power place to extend a line directly to your pool at no charge.
Watch their faces turn as green as a leprechaun eating peas in a field of four-leaf clovers when they realize that your pool has been voted Best in Berks County!